The tale of two binkies

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Okay, not really but I had to start that way. So, I saw my sister's blog with her little guy and his binky and thought I would share how we got the binkies away from R-guy. It is a sad tale and not our proudest moment as parents. Maybe it can help someone out there...

About 6 months ago, R-guy had just turned 3 so we decided it was time to get rid of the binkies. After age 2 years, binkies are only for the bed and are a powerful parent ally by making bedtime or naptime desirable events. However, after 3 years of age, we (as parents pretending to know what we are doing) decided that it was time to say goodbye. We choose to use the same plan that had worked well for big J: the goodbye binky party and binky fairy bribe. I was nervous about doing it for Jacob because it is deceptive (but so is Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy) but it seemed to work OK, so we tried it again. The plan goes like this: You tell your child that it is time for the binky fairy to come and get the binkies (you can add that the binky fairy gives them to new babies, if they ask). The binky fairy will come and take the binkies and leave a present, whatever you want - within reason. When the child decides they are ok with that, you pretend to call the binky fairy to schedule the pick-up, let the fairy know the wish list, and set a date. Then, you have a goodbye binky party on the scheduled night: make decorations, order pizza, make cupcakes, invite relatives, and give the child lots of attention. After the party, the 3 year old is supposed to take the binkies, put them in a special box, and put them on the porch for the binky fairy to get them. Then in the morning, presents are waiting to help erase the sadness of the binkies leaving.

Everything was going well at the goodbye binky party until it was time to put the binkies in the box and say goodbye. The R-guy even had two binkies to say goodbye to: one for the mouth and one to rub on his cheek so maybe that made it twice as hard. Whatever it was, he started to freak out, running around the house, hitting me, crying uncontrollably, hiding under things. Some of this is captured on film (see below). We finally calmed him down and got him - on his own - to put the binkies in the box and put it outside. As parents, we were feeling HORRIBLE. I wanted to cry but knew we had to follow through. That night, as we put the R-guy to bed, John said "We love you" and the little guy replied "I love my binkies". It was a sad moment. He was able to go to sleep without them, which surprised me. The next morning the fairy presents (we had to get him 2, one for each binky) helped the sadness a bit but he was sad for many days. Even yesterday, R-guy told John that he still missed his binkies. I keep hoping this memory will fade away and we won't have to hear for years about how we scarred him for life by taking away his binkies.

The pictures below document some of the night. It is still sad for me and R-guy to look at the pictures. I am not sure I would call the plan a success. The binkies are gone, but the pain...

Having fun with aunt and uncle - starting to look a little worried.

Hiding with the binkies

After much wailing and gnashing of teeth (literally), he puts the binkies in the magic box for the fairy to come and get them.

Our pathetic blog

Our sad little blog has not had any posts for over a month and I will tell you exactly who is to blame for this: the computer. Now, don't think I am trying to push the blame off to someone else and not take responsibility for my actions - it really is the computer's fault! Seriously, this computer is old (at least 10 years) and so very SLOW. So slow you want to choke the mouse. But anyway, it has been an exciting month. Some highlights:

* Alison turned 1 month and 11 1/2 pounds and is nearing 2 months and 12? 13? pounds
* Summer soccer and t-ball ended
* We overcame our end-of-the-Olympics pains. The boys love to pretend they are Michael Phelps whenever we go swimming.
* Aunt Katy came for a visit and took the boys on several fun trips
* Grandma and Grandpa Young came down to visit Alison
* We took a last day of summer vacation trip to the Oakland Zoo
* Jacob started kindergarten!
* Ryan started preschool!
* I became officially un-disabled (according to the State of California) after giving birth
* I became a homework helper
* We took a family ferry ride to SF and visited some tourist spots with the kids (I think their favorite part was seeing "the bush man" at Fisherman's wharf. Most of you know what I am talking about - the guy disguised as a plant who scares people for money. Jacob was scared of him at first but for days after, that was all they could both talk about.
* Alison slept for 7 hours straight one night!!
* Our summer garden came to end except for some tomatoes on the blossom rot damaged plants and a second crop from our cantaloupe, banana squash, and pumpkin plants. We just need a few more weeks of warm weather for the second crop to fully ripen.

Here are some selected photos from the last month.

The two youngest

Gramps & Grandma S and Aunt Katy


The family at "the bench"*


Beautiful day in SF


Grandpa Y and the kids


Jacob and his homework helper

* John's eagle scout project at a regional park in SJ. It is about an hour hike uphill to get there. For some reason, we decided to go on the Saturday Katy was in town. It was a super hot day and Alison was just a few weeks (like 2) old. Amazingly enough, the boys hiked the whole way and we did not have to carry them at all but it did help to have Katy there. It was a fun afternoon.

Trash talking at Tiny Tots soccer

Ryan has been going to parent/kid soccer classes for the last several months, and I believe this is his second or third session. He is one of the older kids in the class and by now knows all the games the coach uses. When we enrolled him this time for the same class, we were concerned he would be bored, but the coach likes him and said he was a little young for the next class. Our concerns were justified as the following story from last Saturday will attest.

The coach had a miniature soccer field set up and the game was dribbling red light green light from one end line to the other. Ryan is somewhat of a spoiler because the coach can only get at most one red light in before Ryan is at the opposite end of the field. So after a couple trips back and forth and a lot of waiting for everyone else, Ryan says to me, “Everybody in this class are doofuses.” I’m sure at least a few parents heard him so I’m in full on damage control. I come back with, “Ryan that is not a nice word we don’t call people that.” Then he says, “Everybody in this class are butts.” “Do you want to go sit in the car and soccer will be over for the day?” Ryan, “No. Yes. Everybody are booties (meaning butts). No, I don’t want to go to the car.”

I don’t think we do anything to cause our children to behave and say some of the things they do, but man everybody looks down at you when your kid does something like that. My kids are also especially fond of informing people that they have fat tummies.

Oh the joys...

Some pictures of Alison (aka Ki-Ki)

Here are a few pictures of Alison that we took on Sunday. I decided to give her a bath and then put on the dress and then I figured we should take pictures. This was all at a time when we should have been making/having dinner, but sometimes you just have to take pictures of the baby. I tried to get Jacob and Ryan to put on nice shirts so that they could be in a nice picture with Alison but only Jacob complied. Ryan, in his 3 year old way, said that he did not feel like changing his shirt for the picture. Hence, the orange shirt.

Jacob, Alison, and Ryan in the backyard. The boys called her "ki-ki" before she was born and while we were very clear that it would not be her name, even John and I are having a hard time not calling her Ki-ki, the kik-ster, kik-meister, kiks, etc. I think the nickname will stay around for awhile.

Alison getting a little tired of the photo shoot.

Alison Lorena Young

This is a test. We found out all our pictures of Alison's birth were 4000 X 3000 (pixels?) and about 2.5MB per photo. It has taken us awhile to find on our computer the functionality to shrink these images.

If this post works we will post more.

Here she is.

Here are the monkey men doing what they do.

Nearing the finish line...

John is probably going to pass out when he sees that I actually posted on our family blog.  I know he started it so I would write but that just hasn't seemed to happen.  I haven't been that motivated since I broke our digital camera and felt it would be lame to post without pictures. But, I guess written documentation still has its merits so, I thought I would post a few random thoughts about the end stage of pregnancy.  Due date is Saturday, 7/26, but what does that really mean?  It means the end is near but near is such a relative term after being pregnant for 9 months.  It could be tonight or next week or even (gasp!) August.  For some reason, if this baby decides to come in August, that just seems like such a psychological blow for me even though it is less than a week after my due date.  The changing of the month makes it seem very far away. 

 

I have been feeling good the last few weeks and have not had the feeling that I am so big that I can't even get any bigger - a common feeling at the end of my last pregnancy.  I love the comments people make to me and have people telling me (on the same day):  "wow, were you this big on the last one?  I don't remember you being this big" or "you look ready to pop" as well as others saying "you look great" and "I can't believe you are almost due".  I have decide the second group of people are liars but I do appreciate them. 

 

I have been trying to go the gym twice a week to walk on the treadmill and while no one makes comments to me, the lady at the front desk tells John "I feel so sorry for your wife".  So, I guess I do look like a big cow on the treadmill.  Going to the gym has been difficult since the heat wave we had here a week or so ago which made my feet swell up like sausages. Seriously.  I had never had pregnancy swelling before and it was fairly disgusting.  I still could manage to get my running shoes on but barely had enough lace left to tie a knot.

 

This weekend we (read "I") spent a lot of time nesting.  I cleaned, did laundry, put away baby clothes, thought about writing thank you cards from my baby shower, and put up the fancy pack-n-play with bassinet addition in our room.  John actually did that and moved the bed over a few inches so I can squeeze between the bed and the pack-n-play.  I think I would be ok now if the baby did come.  For me it is always "don't come, don't come, don't come. Ok, you can come. Anytime. Ready. Please come soon. Are you listening to me?"  Last week I finished a few other remaining items on my list:  pedicure and eyebrows.  I mean, you never look good in the delivery room but at least I will know that my toenails are painted and my eyebrows are well maintained.  It will help. 

 

I have a secret wish that the next time I go to the MD she will say "Oh my, you are a dilated to a X (number greater than 3) and need to go to the hospital now".  It happened to my sisters but has yet to happen to me.  I just get "Oh, you are still at a 3 like you were the last 3 weeks" and "I can't believe you are still around" and the "do you want to be induced?"  Luckily, my doctor does not seem to think that you need to wait until 41 or even 40 weeks to be induced.  She offered to do it last week but I told her I wasn't ready.  Unfortunately, I see the nurse practioner this week and I think she is a little less carefree in the induction offers. 

 

We will keep you posted with any news over the next few weeks (I will try to not be too graphic in the descriptions  - maybe this post was already too graphic.  John hates most words associated with delivery and I think even "dilate" may be too much for him). 

 

  

This one is dedicated to all the new mothers.

So tonight during Family Home Evening the following conversation occurred:

Suzy: "When the baby comes there are going to be some changes at home."

Ryan: "Like I get to color the big James (the train) coloring book."

Suzy: "Yes, but you only get to color the James coloring book when I'm feeding the baby."

Jacob (yelling because that seems to be his only volume setting nowadays): "YOU MEAN WHEN YOU'RE MILKING HER?"